Managing Meltdowns in Children with Autism
Dr Sonali Kataria (MBBS, MD, DNB, MNAMS, Autism Specialist)
Parent of a child with ASD
Center-Head, Sunrise Learning Noida, www.sunriselearning.in
If you have a child on the autism spectrum, then you definitely know about “meltdowns”.
You must have gone through several of these storms!!
And the pain and the agony that they cause (to the child, as well as to the parent!!)
Remember the child GOES THROUGH THAT STORM, alone and scared!!
While the parent is a HELPLESS SPECTATOR, wishing and hoping for the storm to end.
But that pain and agony should not affect the inner peace of a parent.
The parent is the UNIVERSE for the child!!
The child looks up to the parent during a “happy time” and during a “crisis”.
So the parent needs to be CALM and COMPOSED even during the roughest of the storms that the child goes through.
So that the child can find his “comfort” and “composure” in his UNIVERSE!
Parents, please remember: “THIS WILL PASS”!
What to Do During a Meltdown
When your child is having a meltdown, you can do the following:
- Stay calm and relaxed (YES YOU CAN!!)
- Speak MINIMALLY!!!
- Speak “it’s okay” softly in a comforting voice to let him know that everything is okay and everything will be okay.
- If possible, sit down quietly next to your child, without speaking anything.
- Keep your body language relaxed, despite the crying, screaming and howling child next to you.
- If your child is self-hitting, thrashing, etc., protect yourself and give space and cushioning to your thrashing child without anxiety.
Remove all dangerous objects from the site quietly.
Convert this place to a SAFE, COOL, RELAXED PLACE.
If the child is using his hands to hit himself, try your best to hold his hands quietly, or provide some distraction to the hands, such as dough or clay.
Only comforting words like, “it’s okay”.
- No crowds, and no asking “What happened?” or “Why are you screaming?”
If he knew, and if he could tell, he would never be screaming!!
If you have access, play the Gayatri Mantra, Om chants, or any soothing music that the child likes.
After the Meltdown Is Over
DO 2 THINGS:
1. Do an ABC Analysis
Do an ABC ANALYSIS to find out the trigger. Once you identify the triggers, modify the environment to avoid all possible triggers.
Some very common triggers are:
- Heat
- Prolonged waiting
- Hunger
- Lack of sleep
- Repeated failures at a task
- Inability to express
- Sensory overload
- Loud sounds
- Bright lights
- Crowds
- Too many smells
- Too much touch from too many new people
- Too many sudden changes
- Too many instructions
- Too many expectations
- A big sudden change without prior information or mental preparation
- Unpleasant words used by someone
Identification of the triggers can help to PREVENT such conditions in the future.
2. Create a 5-Step Social Story
Create a 5-step social story for your child for MANAGING STRESS and start teaching this coping strategy whenever he is in a good, happy and connected mood.
This social story can be taught 2–3 times every day for 3 months, before a child can actually begin to apply it when struck by a crisis, helping to avoid a meltdown.
The Simple 5-Step Plan for Managing a Stress Situation
- Go out in fresh air / cool place — get away from the trigger.
- Take 10 deep breaths, count till 10, chant Om 10 times, or play music on your iPad.
- Drink cool water.
- Do whatever helps you to calm yourself — jump, run, eat a snack, listen to music, play with a sensory toy, watch a visual timer, etc.
- Give a hug to Mom and get back to work or take a nap.
This 5-step coping plan can actually be taught to all children.
Building Coping Skills and Independence
Children can be taught to carry their SENSORY BAG at all times. It can contain their coping tools, such as:
- A sensory toy
- An iPad for communication or listening to music
- A towel
- A bottle of water
- Other individually appropriate calming tools
It might take a while for the child to understand and learn these COPING SKILLS, but once learnt, they can really help prevent many such catastrophic meltdowns.
Best Wishes for Your Journey
Best wishes and a happy journey ahead.
Learn to differentiate between a “tantrum” and a “meltdown”!!
www.sunriselearning.in
